Today was one of those days. I literally looked at the calendar and had it figured out that in 4 years, 3 months, 5 days and 12 hours, I will be free to leave this city.
I have never wanted this to be an "I hate Washington" blog. "Hillbilly Debutante" was invented as a creative outlet, as a way to have a good time, let loose and mostly just make fun of myself.
But I also want to clear up a misconception. I haven't lived on the farm/ranch in over 20 years. I am also a fairly educated person and I speak perfect English (so don't let the 'hillbilly talk' fool ya!) This isn't my first experience with city life. I've lived in several cities across the country and overseas.
In that 20 years, I have lived an exciting, blissful, happy life surrounded by tons of friends and people who love me.
I have always been able to adjust to the culture and get along famously wherever I have lived.
I'm not great-looking, don't play a musical instrument, don't sing, dance or paint. I have no athletic ability (does equestrienne count?), can't stick to a diet. I'm a bad driver, a bad cook. I can bake a good pie, but the crust always turns out ugly, which cancels it out.
But the one thing I've always had is exceptional people and speaking skills. People have always liked me and I have always liked people. I have never, ever left a place without making a friend.
My number one goal in life has always been to be 'nice.' Sounds hokie, doesn't it? I know, but it's true. One of my best qualities is that I don't have one mean bone in my body. I've always been able to engage people as well as entertain them with crazy stories and one-liners.
I love to be the cheerleader, the encourager, the one you know you can depend on when you have a wild and wacky dream in life and no one believes you can really pull it off - I'm the one at the end of the finish line with open arms waiting for you! I LOVE to love people and I LOVE to be loved, and I've always been so fortunate to have that in my life.
Except here. Here that gift is null and void. I have no purpose in this place. No one needs anything from me. At work, the store, the streets, I can greet someone with a friendly smile and 'hello, how are you?', and they're faces are blank. I've even had people try to pick a fight with me over a smile. Sad, but true.
Your blogs make me happy. I love reading about what all of you are doing, what you have planned. I laugh with you. I pray for you and with you. I cry with you. You all offer something unique. Most of all what I love is feeling that no matter where you all are located, you're just a 'mouse click' away and I can 'visit' anytime I want.
I would love to hear some of your ideas if you've ever been in my position and feel that you've been 'misplaced and forgotten.' How did you deal with it? How did you get over it? Did you have to move? Thanks for 'listening' and I'm eagerly waiting to hear your comments.