Wednesday, April 6, 2011


I've had more than a few people accuse me through the years of being 'shallow.'

I wish.

I would love for the last thought as my big, teased shellacked hair hits the pillow to be about the $595 pair of Manolo Blahniks I saw at Saks today.

Or to be totally focused on finding that perfect product that would reduce the black circles under my eyes that gives me the appearance of being a loser in last nights bar fight.

What's wrong with being shallow, anyway?

Why can't my life be aaalllll about of a closet full of St. John suits. Size 4 St. John suits.

The dictionary lists numerous synonyms for the term 'shallow.'

'empty, flimsy, foolish, frivolous, idle, ignorant, meaningless, puerile and simple'

God, please make me all of these!

Because if I was 'empty-flimsy-foolish-frivolous-idle-ignorant-meaningless-puerile-and-simple' the death of an 11-year-old boy in my neighborhood - whom, I might add, I never knew existed until I saw his picture and the article in the paper - would not phase me.

You see, the self-absorbed 'empty- flimsy- foolish- frivolous-idle -ignorant-meaningless-pueril- and -simple' me wouldn't give a darn because it doesn't affect me.

Even if I could be just three of these - say, 'empty and flimsy, mixed with just a hint of simple', I would not mourn the death of someone else's child, someone I never knew, nor worry about the welfare and impact on his younger brother and sister.

I wouldn't have this incessant need to do the impossible - to take away their pain.

You see, my accusers are wrong. I'm not shallow. Not in the least.

Because how else can you explain the fact that as I lie here in this king-size bed, with the lights out and the curtains blowing gently in the breeze, I swear I can 'feel' a young mothers heart shattering from over 2 blocks away.


Richmond said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Classic Preppy said...

Sorry..the earlier comment was mine, but came up under the wrong Google account.

So beautifully written, Kathie....but so heartbreakingly sad.

Prayers for all,

High Heeled Life said...

What I am discovering people see what they want to see... and often its a reflection of themselves or what THEY are and reflect that onto others.

Prayers and thoughts to that family...HHL

AshTreeCottage said...

What a tragedy ~ I have no words.

Susan and Bentley

Becky said...

That is so beautiful and I would be the exact same way. I have a knack for internalizing just about everything, whether it applies to me or not.

My heart goes out to that poor family.

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Nezzy said...

Your feelings are wonderfully written and my heart aches for this mother and their family too.

What a horrific tragic loss of a young life.

My heart and prayers are with this family.

God bless and have a peaceful day sweetie. I know that you are anything but 'shallow'!

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