Monday, June 23, 2008

Dixie Road trip planned....and Mama is coming for a visit!

Whew!! I have had my behind planted in a chair in front of my computer working working like crazy on my book! When I left you I was on Chapter 9. I'm getting ready to start Chapter 15. It doesn't seem like I've made a lot of progress, but trust me...I HAVE been writing!!

Anyway, I've missed you all! Just want ya to know the doctor has given me a thumbs up on driving, so you know what that means!!! DIXIE ROAD TRIP!!

Mama is also comin' for a visit - she should be here tomorrow and I am so excited. We're are plannin' on crankin' up ole' Dixie and headin' to Surrey, Virginia for the next road trip.

Check back tomorrow or the next day and I'll give ya more details!

Hopefully, the camera will be charged up and I can send you some new photos.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Hillbilly Debutante is out for a few days....

Well, actually I'm in for a few days. Can I let you in on a little secret? (Some of you already know this.) But....I'm working on a novel. I'm kind of going out on a limb a little bit by telling you this when it's not quite done (I'm on Chapter 9). It's going to the publisher by the end of July (Yikes - it's already June!)
The publisher is interested -when I told her a few years ago what was going on in my life she suggested I write about it and send the manuscript - but made no promises.

Am I nervous? Oh, yeah. I've had articles published. I've written news stories, ad copy - even written an award-winning slogan. But never a book. It's fiction based on a true story. It's based on something that happened to our family that I still can't believe happened - you wouldn't even believe it if I told you. But those who do know about it, have insisted - no pushed me to write about it. You know who you are - so here I am.

I am asking my friends that know me and love me to pray for me. Writing a book is hard - regardless of how exciting, scary and bizarre the plot is. The second half is harder because we have to relive what happened. I say we because to write it is to go over it again in my head which puts me in a bad mood. And my family knows this - but yet they keep encouraging me.
So, give me a few days to get some more chapters under my belt, and I'll be back before you know it! By the way - got the 'all-clear' from my doctor earlier in the week and I can start driving again. You know what that means - DIXIE ROAD TRIP!!!!!
(by the way - I love to hear from y'all. Please leave comments. I can use all the love I can get right now!!)

Saturday, June 7, 2008

June Cleaver would never wear sweat pants to the mall

Of all the sitcom parents throughout the years, even up to today, I think Ward and June Cleaver are clearly the best. They always knew their place - at the head of the household. They never tried to be their kids best friends. They never tried to be cool. And they were always a team - if they had a disagreement it was never in front of the boys. They also demanded their kids behave and mind their manners. (Yes, ma'am, No, sir)


June, especially, is my idol. No, ladies, I don't think you should wear your finest dress, heels and pearls while you're cleaning the tub (unless you want to). However, I have found that if I put my makeup on, wear a little bit of jewelry, do my hair and wear something fairly cute I feel really energetic and find myself wanting to do my chores. (I don't do heels because I'd break my neck. ) Try it! It works. Not only that - I promise you that your family will like it. Not only will they have a clean, sparklin' house, but Mama will smell and look nice, too. Not sayin' that the majority of you girls


don't already do this, but you'd be shocked at what I see around here most of the time...

I see women who, in the middle of the day look like they haven't combed their hair or gotten out of their pajamas, let alone put on a little makeup. You think your men don't care? Wroooong!

Honey has completely banned sweat pants from my wardrobe! Okay, I am allowed to wear them in the wintertime when I go for my walk. But that's it. He hates them and not just on me - but all women. He made a statement one day that just really shocked me. He said he thought part of the downfall of our society is that we've gotten too casual. People don't have any pride in their appearance. Which leads to no pride in your job, no pride in your home, no pride in your family. Think about it. Don't we feel better when we get out of the shower and we're all powdered up? I know I do.

I know June didn't have any teenage daughters, but if she did, I'd bet my bottom dollar that she wouldn't have tried to dress like 'em or compete with 'em. June would never have tried to wear short shorts, or wear midriff bearing tops, although she did have the figure for it. She was too much of a lady and had too much class to wear something like that.
She never flirted with with Wally and Beaver's friends. When that rascal Eddie Haskell tried to flirt with her, she didn't go out and have a mid-life crisis, suddenly donning mini-skirts and halters. No, she did what any good Mom would do - she'd automatically become suspicious of him and wonder what he was up to. I know the Cleaver's didn't really exist (darn it!) Ozzie and Harriet were a real family (even though they had their own sitcom), and they had the day to day problems that most families have. I guess if truth be known it's television like 'that' that I miss. Everything about television today is sexual. Everything. Or if it's not sexual innuendos then it's 'adult situations'. Do you know the "Rascal Flats" song - "I Miss Mayberry"? Read the words and you'll know exactly where I'm comin' from.



Sometimes it feels like this world is spinning faster

Than it did in the old days

So naturally, we have more natural disasters

From the strain of a fast pace

Sunday was a day of rest

Now, it’s one more day for progress

And we can’t slow down ‘cause more is best It’s all an endless process

Chorus (Well) I miss sleeping

Sitting on the porch drinking ice-cold cherry Coke

Where everything is black and white duh na na na na na na na na

Picking on a six string

Where people pass by and you call them by their first name

Watching the clouds roll by Bye, bye

Sometimes I can hear this old earth shouting Through the trees as the wind blows

That’s when I climb up here on this mountain

To look through God’s window

Now I can’t fly

But I got two feet that get me high up here

Above the noise and city streets

My worries disappear

(Repeat Chorus)

( Sometimes I dream I’m driving down an old dirt road Not even listed on a map

I pass a dad and son carrying a fishing pole

But I always wake up every time I try to turn back

(Repeat Chorus)

Songwriter: Arlos Smith

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Lessons from Granny....

I've come to the conclusion that society just needs to slow down a bit - quite a bit if ya ask me. And I'm not the only one that thinks it. Don't y'all think these risin' gas prices might be a sign from the Good Lord that we just need to hold our horses for just a dog-gone minute?

All this hustle and bustle and everyone tryin' to keep up with the Jones'. ( Who the heck are the Jones' anyway? Only Jones' I knew were Ab and Mary Lou - and heck - they don't pay no 'never mind' to what y'all are doin'!) Anyhow, it got me to thinkin' - in times like these "What Would Granny Do?"

Well, first of all money didn't change 'em much. With the exception of moving into a new house in a new state, their life didn't change all that much. Just 'cause they were now high-falutin' city people didn't mean they needed to go and buy a new car. Why the ole' truck that took 'em cross country from Taney County, Missouri to Beverly Hills worked just fine. If it ain't broke - don't fix it! Same with the clothes - why buy fancy new duds when the ones ya' got fit ya' just fine?


With all that money, Granny could easily have afforded some kitchen help - but no way! Granny still made everything from scratch. Only lazy folk took shortcuts. Which brings to mind that

Granny still believed in a good day's work. She was disgusted by the rich, spoiled people in Beverly Hills. And she still expected the young' uns to behave. Some of my favorite episodes would be when Jethro would come up with one of his hare-brained ideas and Granny'd have to grab him by the ear and bring him to his knees....er, senses.

And another lesson...possum's good no matter how ya cook it. JUST KIDDING!!! Do you know how many city people ask me if us hillbillies really do eat possum? Come on, get real. As long as there are cans of Spam on the Wal-Mart shelf we don't need to resort to road kill.

Granny was wise, yessiree! She knew Mr. Drysdale didn't give two hoots about them! All he cared about was their money. See the look on her face? The kinfolk may have told em' California is the place they outta be, but she knew the best place in the world was the Ozark Hills of Missouri.
Okay, today with everybody waitin' in two hour lines to see the likes of the new Sex and the City movie, and sitcoms like Will and Grace (now only in reruns) and Two and a Half Men, I know I'm in the minority - but The Beverly Hillbillies was the epitome of wholesome family entertainment. Since, I've been house-bound from my surgery I've been watchin' every day and as Uncle Jed would say - yee, doggies - I forgot just how funny these shows are! So the most important lesson from Granny?? That yes, we can have good, clean television without sexual innuendos, dirty jokes and adult situations. Call me old-fashioned, prudish, or wierd (trust me, I've been called worse), but our world would be a lot better off nowadays if we still had Granny - do I hear an Amen?